Thursday, February 17, 2005


so i found myself yesterday making small talk to rather attractive (daggum gorgeous) girls yesterday.....5 years ago, i would have been fidgety and shaking and studdering and possibly make an embarrassing noice if a girl of this beauty said a word to me, but i was confident at that moment for some reason....enough so to know they were sort of sophomores but they didn't know cause the art institute doesn't do normal semesters..they are interior designers and one is interning at a company and the other is not working currently......this knowlege may be insignificant but it's one step up from where i used to be....after they left i reallized i didn't even get their names....that's one of the harder things for me to do...if i ask their names, in my mind, that means that i am telling them, i want you..........i do want them..or one of them at least, but i didn't want to come across that way for some boss says that they are out of our league....i dont want to believe that...if so , i hope i can expand my league in that direction. i need a recruiter to do some searching or something...but i get the final say whether they are in or out.....anyway, i'm searching for a girl who is of course a good Christain. I know the church is the best way to do that, but it's always girls outside the church(my physical church group) that want to get to know.....should i go on a date not knowing if the girl is a Christian or not....should i invite her to church as one of our first things together......iv'e always thought the first person i really seriously date is the one i will marry....if i'm always interested in girls i don't do i get to know them without dating them.......anyway, i don't know anything about girls i talked to except for what came up in that conversation....and that they were extremely attractive and seemed nice at that moment......of course they left without a hint that i was attracted...what if she was a good Christian girl and i let her go like am i supposed to know who to date without dating them first.(unless i know them already)....i know i know. i need to pray about it.....God will provide...but how much do i rely on him, and how much part do i take in finding a girl. do i just sit back and do nothing and God will show this girl with flashing lights and arrows pointing to her......does he require me to pursue someone and He makes them accept my pursuance....what does it mean to rely on God to provide the perfect girl for me?...does that mean i need to be idle or does it mean I just trust that God will make my actions a success...any comments any feedback....i could also use prayers too.....thanks...


Shea said...

Adam...Adam, calm down, breathe. I think you're putting WAY to much stress on yourself about all of this. If you don't put so much pressure on yourself about it, I promise things will just naturally happen. ... For instance, about getting a girl's name, Just say, "Hi, I'm Adam" (and usually, in return, someone will say "Hi, I'm so-and-so".) If she doesn't, JUSK ASK Her. I promise I would never think a guys "wants" me if he asked my name. I would only assume that he would like to know my name.
Adam, you're a great guy. Again, don't pressure yourself about "finding someone." If its meant to happen, it will. And the moment you quit stressing about it, is the moment it just..well happens.
You don't have to be perfect, you just have to be you. That's what she should like the most about you anyway.

Anonymous said...

adam, i think its a bad idea to assume that you'll marry the first girl you date. you could get into trouble that way.

i agree with shea. introduce yourself and the natural response is that shell tell you her name, then you can make out. its the natural progression. have fun!

Shea said...

My 2nd word of advice, disregard Jeremy's advice (except the introduction part).

Brown Sugar said...

i'm not stressing about it as much as it sounded i just seems that "just being myself" is not getting me anywhere with having a girlfriend....i am confident a girl will like me when she gets to know me..she will love my family and friends as well....just getting through that first interaction is the hardest part.

kentbrantly said...

brown sugar, i was impressed with shea's advice. while there is no guarantee that the perfect woman will walk into your life right now just because you sincerely and humbly desire that, i think shea's advice to just chill out and be yourself is pretty sound. and yeah, don't listen to jeremy :-)
all that being said, i feel your pain. it can cause some anxiety when you start obsessing over "how will i meet 'HER'?" and how will i know? and what should i do? and how hard should i pursue? as a single guy who isn't old but isn't getting any younger, i feel your pain.
i am indeed coming to dallas again.... on saturday. i talked to timmy. i want to get a group together for dinner. so i hope you come. see you soon, yo. and thanks for the well wishes regarding guatemala. it will be an adventure for sure.

benay said...

Adam! I talked to Kara the other night and she filled me in on the awesome-ness that is your blog. Anyway, hope you're doing good!

P.S. Blogger sucks, it's all about xanga baby.

Tidmore said...

ADAM!!!! Hey man, how are you doing. First off I'm so proud of you, you've come along way since the days when you saw a girl and couldn't say anything, actually talking to two girls at once!!

But Seriously, like evryone else has said be yourself, talk to them and just be the amazing guy we all know you are and they will fall for you. But just let it happen, don't try to force something to come out of it, and eventually once you've talked a few times, if you like her and fell there's a chance, ask the girl out.

Or you could just tell her your name, she'll say hers, and you start making out. Right on Jerm!!!

But seriously you are great and I know there's someone out there coming your way, I don't know when but I know GOD is making you ready for her, and her ready for you.

PS Are you coming to LA when Jeri and I are going to be there, cause A) we really want to see you, and B) we want to know if you might want to go w/ us to Disneyland!

Drop me a line either at my LJ (which you can get to by going to my blogspot page, which I belive you can get to by clicking on my name) or shoot me an e-mail

God Bless!!!